(first published Jan 2007)
I did something daring today. Well, daring for me anyway. I emailed the agency that handled my adoption and asked if they still had my file and if I could access the non-identifying info in it again. I think it would do me good to have on paper exactly what it says – nationalities, etc. My mom remembers a lot, and is always open to my questions, but time does soften memories a bit! Just ask me how I know, lol. So I’m checking my email a million times a day. 🙂 I also asked if they allow a letter to be put in the file for the other party (in my case my birthmom). Just wondering. 😉
It’s funny -OK, I take that back, it’s NOT funny, it’s downright sad and scary- that in my last sentence I first wrote “THE birthmom” instead of “MY birthmom.” And trying to change it to MY got me all emotional. It just shows how much I live in constant denial. To have to actually *type out* that there is another woman out there who gave birth to me… ha, I’ve already stuffed it back down and writing about it now is like typing out a grocery list. Gotta love repression, lol. NOT.